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Not Part of the Plan- GirlDefined

I was so thankful to again be chosen to be a part of the launch team for GirlDefined’s new book: “Not Part of the Plan: Trusting God with the twists and turns of your story.” I was so excited when they announced this new book. I’ve been so encouraged as I’ve followed the story of Bethany’s long journey of singleness and Kristen’s trial of infertility. Their openness to these struggles have encouraged me so much as I see their love for the Lord grow even in the midst of hard. I remember hearing Kristen share of her third miscarriage at the 2019 GirlDefined conference- months after a big and hard life disappointment for me. I was lost and confused and my only hope was to cling to the Lord as my life didn’t go in the direction I had hoped it would. And hearing the struggle Kristen had gone through and how the Lord comforted and worked in her heart was so helpful.  I was so excited to read this book. I’ve loved every book of theirs. It’s so personable and so very practical. They share thei
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Contentment

Contentment.

What a great time to learn to be content.

This is something the Lord has been teaching me through all that's going on.  Contentment.  Honestly contentment has always been so hard for me.  I'm always looking at others, comparing myself, thinking about the next step, the next best thing.  I've always overthought everything.  I've always looked at others to be my source of what my life should look like.  I'm so very competitive by nature.  I'm not much of a live by the moment person, but always thinking of the future, how this will effect the next thing in my life.  I've always put so many expectations on myself.  Of what I need to get done today, what tomorrow needs to look like and always, always on what my future needs to be.
https://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1vFAr9sEXtgTalohERUFqTa6SMU0EtOGZ
So, when nothing looks like what I had expected today to look like as a 22 year old, I get discouraged, frustrated and confused.  I began comparing over and over again.  I began questioning myself and God.  And I doubt.  I fear.  I overthink.

Well, being stuck at home, with absolutely no idea for how long and if life will ever go back to 'normal' again,  and not being able to pursue or work towards any of my hopes or goals, my trust in the Lord is a constant battle of fear and trust.  Contentment becomes even more of a struggle.

(Honestly, even having a taste, a slight silver, of what I wanted didn't even provide contentment then)

This battle is everyday, at least a couple of times a day, of surrendering my hopes, dreams and expectations to the Lord.  Of asking for peace in the times of uncertainty.  Of growing in rest and hope in the Lord.  Of letting go of any 'control' I hope to have and trusting He is good, sovereign and loves me.  That He will provide exactly what I need, when I need it.  He hears and answers my prayers and there is so much hope and peace in knowing He knows.  And He loves us.

I'm going through a devotion on contentment now with a friend and it has been so good and is making me rethink how I've always thought of contentment:
Contentment: Seeing God's Goodness by Megan Hill.


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